{"product_id":"funny-food-pun-shirt-ass-paragus-asparagus-vegetable-humor-tee","title":"Funny Food Pun Shirt – Ass Paragus Asparagus Vegetable Humor Tee, Youth \u0026 Adult DTG Print","description":"\u003cp\u003eSay it out loud. Slowly. This \u003cstrong\u003efunny food pun shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e breaks \u003cstrong\u003easparagus\u003c\/strong\u003e into \u003cstrong\u003eAss Paragus\u003c\/strong\u003e across the chest, and the entire joke is that the word was hiding it in plain sight the whole time... nobody had to invent anything, it was always right there. Rendered as bold vector art with sharp linework, heavy contrast, and clean flat color, the spear texture and the tight scaled tip carry enough detail to read as genuinely asparagus rather than a generic green stick, which is what keeps the gag from falling flat. Strong pick if you have been searching for a \u003cstrong\u003efunny vegetable shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e, an \u003cstrong\u003easparagus tee\u003c\/strong\u003e, a \u003cstrong\u003efood pun graphic shirt\u003c\/strong\u003e, \u003cstrong\u003ekitchen humor apparel\u003c\/strong\u003e, \u003cstrong\u003erude wordplay shirts\u003c\/strong\u003e, or \u003cstrong\u003egag gift tees\u003c\/strong\u003e that stay clever instead of tipping fully into crude.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eThis is a two-second delay followed by a groan, which is exactly what a good pun shirt should deliver. Wear it to cookouts, farmers markets, dinner parties, cooking classes, restaurant shifts, food festivals, garden club days, brunch, game nights, vending events, and regular grocery runs where somebody in the produce aisle is going to read it twice and lose it. Line cooks and chefs wear this one on their off days, and gardeners wear it to the plant sale. Youth and adult sizes both run, though this one skews grown. White gives maximum contrast so the lettering reads instantly at distance, while black keeps the punchline a little quieter until people get close.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eAs a gift this \u003cstrong\u003eunisex graphic tee\u003c\/strong\u003e reliably gets a reaction, usually an eye roll and then a laugh. It works for the pun collector, the home chef, the professional cook, the restaurant crew, the gardener, the vegetarian, the vegan, the nutritionist, the friend with the filthiest sense of humor and the cleanest kitchen, the dad who tells the same jokes forever, and the coworker who brings a salad every single day. It fits birthdays, Christmas, White Elephant exchanges, Father's Day, housewarmings, cooking class gifts, and just-because gag gifts. Add the matching sticker for a set.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eEvery shirt is printed with \u003cstrong\u003eDTG (direct-to-garment) printing\u003c\/strong\u003e, which drives the ink down into the fabric fibers instead of stacking it on top like a stiff plastic transfer. That keeps the lettering clean-edged instead of bleeding, keeps the greens rich through repeated washes, and keeps the shirt soft and breathable rather than rigid and plasticky. It will not crack, peel, or flake the way cheap heat-pressed graphics do after a handful of cycles. Original Street Rebirth artwork, drawn in-house, not licensed stock art.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eCare:\u003c\/strong\u003e White shirts need no special washing... machine wash and dry as normal. Black shirts are printed over a white-ink underbase and are more delicate, so wash inside out in cold water on a gentle cycle and tumble dry low or hang dry.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDetails:\u003c\/strong\u003e Unisex graphic t-shirt available in youth and adult sizes. DTG (direct-to-garment) printed original Street Rebirth artwork on soft, breathable cotton-blend fabric.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"StreetRebirth","offers":[{"title":"White \/ Youth Extra S (4-5)","offer_id":49258739302698,"sku":null,"price":14.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Youth S (6-7)","offer_id":49258739335466,"sku":null,"price":14.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Youth M (8-9)","offer_id":49258739368234,"sku":null,"price":14.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Youth L (10-12)","offer_id":49258739401002,"sku":null,"price":14.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Adult S","offer_id":49258739433770,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Adult M","offer_id":49258739466538,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Adult L","offer_id":49258739499306,"sku":null,"price":22.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Adult XL","offer_id":49258739532074,"sku":null,"price":23.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Adult 2XL","offer_id":49258739564842,"sku":null,"price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ Adult 3XL","offer_id":49258739597610,"sku":null,"price":27.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Adult S","offer_id":49258739630378,"sku":null,"price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Adult M","offer_id":49258739663146,"sku":null,"price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Adult L","offer_id":49258739695914,"sku":null,"price":30.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Adult XL","offer_id":49258739728682,"sku":null,"price":31.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Adult 2XL","offer_id":49258739761450,"sku":null,"price":33.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Black \/ Adult 3XL","offer_id":49258739794218,"sku":null,"price":35.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0503\/1129\/9244\/files\/IMG_6284.png?v=1726094990","url":"https:\/\/shopstreetrebirth.com\/products\/funny-food-pun-shirt-ass-paragus-asparagus-vegetable-humor-tee","provider":"StreetRebirth","version":"1.0","type":"link"}